The Political Translator: Because somebody has to say it



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#5 Republican debate in Jacksonville, FL tonight at 8 p.m.

Translation: Obama will rise in the polls tomorrow morning


#4 Romney is too rich to be President

Translation: That's why I'm voting for the other multimillionaire candidate


#3 Ahmadinejad says Iran is ready for nuclear talks

Translation: Maybe I don't want to get attacked just yet


#2 Newt Gingrich Promises a moon base if elected

Translation: I am campaigning near the NASA headquarters


#1 Romney stumbles when asked if he will release his tax records

Translation: Yeah, I'll release my tax records...just not for 2009. Don't worry about that year.